ALL NINE EDITIONS
In print.
Every edition is available as a 4×6 pocket paperback and a Kindle on Amazon — printed, bound, and ready to gift. Or grab the $3 PDF for immediate deployment. Same specimens, your choice of medium.
Airport Edition
Four volumes — gate to carousel. The species in its natural habitat.
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Airport Edition
Vol. I · The Departure
The original. The gate area, fully catalogued. Twenty-five specimens from the Crypto Bro to the Wine-at-10am Lady.
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Airport Edition
Vol. 2 · The Layover
The long, fluorescent purgatory between flights. The species does not vanish — it settles in.
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Airport Edition
Vol. 3 · The Boarding
Group 1 has not been called. The herd has formed anyway. Eight specimens of the slow stampede.
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Airport Edition
Vol. 4 · The Arrival
The seatbelt sign is off. The species reveals its final forms. Unbuckling, carousel, the long walk out.
Wedding Edition
Four volumes — cocktail hour to send-off. The species, dressed up.
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Wedding Edition
Vol. 1 · The Cocktail Hour
The ceremony is over; the real fieldwork begins. Open bar, seating chart, half-remembered faces.
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Wedding Edition
Vol. 2 · The Ceremony
The pews, the processional, the guest who films all of it on an iPad. Eight specimens.
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Wedding Edition
Vol. 3 · The Reception
Toasts that run long. A dance floor that goes off. The species at its most festive and unguarded.
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Wedding Edition
Vol. 4 · The Send-Off
Last dance, sparkler line, the guests who won't leave. The species, emotionally compromised.
Bachelor & Bachelorette Edition
The complete party field guide — 13 specimens.
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Bachelor & Bachelorette Edition
The Complete Field Guide
The group chat made flesh. One weekend. Thirteen specimens — the party planner, the sober sherpa, the venmo avoider.
The $3 PDF lands instantly.
No shipping. No waiting. Print it at home or open it on your phone and mark squares as you spot them. The paperback is the gift option — the PDF is the deploy-at-the-gate option.
See all editions — $3 PDF →